Like many parts of the country during the winter, we have had some harsh weather here. Recently an unusual storm piled on the snow and ice. I had been saying I miss the beauty of snow. (Be careful what you wish for!!) Coupled with the storm was a loss of power and-- zap --------- my computer got wiped out! For days and days, there was a problem in getting the power to come back on. So I apologize if you have been looking for my blog- but I am finally back and in full swing.
So here's the thing: like all things in life we have the choice as to how we are going to deal with circumstances. In fact I often say this to clients: Are you going to "re-act" or are you going to "respond" ? For example, I could get more frustrated and upset (re-act) , or I could relax, take it in stride and let the people who do the technological stuff work it out (respond) .
I dare say this is a much easier example than those by which we relate to one another. Most often people find themselves in confusion and emotional messiness when it comes to how they react or respond to circumstances which involve friends, relatives and work.
To react is to believe yourself to be powerless. "You did this so I am going to do that because of you." It allows the other person or circumstance to control you and your life. And it is NOT the place you want to be. It does not feel good- and we have all been there.
To "respond" implies a choice that comes from within. "You did this but I have a lot of choices as to what I am going to do in regard to it." The difference is - well, apples and pancakes!
Beth came to me with a problem with some of her family members. She felt very powerless. She saw them as having gone from being loving and kind to becoming unappreciative and non-supportive and sometimes even a bit mean spirited. Often times she was tearful and wondered what had happened to cause this change. Over time things got even worse. Family traditions of celebrating birthdays became a "one way street" with Beth doing the giving and nothing being reciprocal. As she put it, it wasn't so much that she expected a present, even a card would have been appreciated. It represented an acknowledgment of her being important in their lives. I know quite a few of you have had similiar experiences.
I advised that Beth talk to these family members. Even I was shocked when she reported that they said it was up to her to remind them of when her birthday was. Hmmmmmm Quite an interesting response from them.
With that and other clear examples, Beth had some choices. One thing she could do was to react. Reacting is often times the first response of human nature. In other words she could be angry, sad, guilty, depressed , forlorn- you name it. She could seek revenge, get even and "forget" their birthdays. She could have taken herself into that downward death spiral of depression that is fed by thinking of herself as being a "victim."
None of us are victims. Yes, people may victimize us. They may be mean, petty, and downright nasty. But folks, that is their business! That is their doing. And that is their karma. We cannot change anyone. But we must be vigilent in not letting them change us! That is where our true power is at!
After some discussion with Beth as to what her values are and the kind of person she is inspired to be, she chose to not be reactive. Although it still puzzles her as to why this situation has come to transpire, she no longer allows it to control her and her feelings. I have encouraged her to let it go and focus instead on being around people who cherish her. With her focus away from that which has hurt her, Beth is learning and growing. She has begun to do volunteer work which makes her feel useful, needed, and good about herself. Remember that one of the secrets of life is that what you focus on grows!
Perhaps the best thing that has occured is that she is no longer angry with her family. We discussed the possiblity that they too are learning. Perhaps for them there are some hurts that need to be healed. But we cannot make someone love or even respect us.
We can love and respect ourselves and bless others in their process... and perhaps keep a safe and healthy distance.
Until next time remember to focus on that which is good for you and let go of the rest.
Blessings and love,
Dr. DyAnn
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Protection from Energy Vampires
Did you ever get a speeding ticket or a warning? I must confess, my driving record is less than perfect. Anytime I have gotten a ticket I knew I "had it coming." I knew I was going over the posted limit. Once I got stopped and got off with a warning. Very nice gentleman! I honestly did not know what the speed limit was and thought I was traveling under the limit. It was one of those movie scenes that starts with "What's the problem, Officer?" Luckily it had a positive ending.
Has that ever happened to you? Have you ever thought you were obeying the law only to find out that you were wrong... and the officer knew it too? And that movie didn't end so well? Those kind of tickets are hard to deal with because we honestly did not think we were doing anything wrong. We were not aware of the law or that the law had changed. That is how it is with our man-made laws.
Another kind of law is not man-made. This is the law of the Universe. (think law of gravity.) Remember here that "law" simply means principles about how things operate. They remain the same over time no matter what the location or the people involved. We can count on them. That being said, once we learn about them, we can work with them for our favor. They are tried and true and for our well being. To not know of them is like driving in a strange place at night with no map and no head lights! No brakes! Everything out of our control.
Universal laws by and large are about energy. By now most everyone realizes that everything is energy.... trees, rocks, animals, snow, me and you. All things visible and that which is invisible. Just because we cannot see something does not mean that it is not real, or that it is not part of the energy matrix. One example would be the wind. We cannot see it but we know how powerful it can be. Thoughts cannot be seen either, but they are immensely powerful energy.
How all of this fits together is that we can know and understand the laws/concepts of how life operates - Universal Laws. We can work with these laws for our benefit. It is akin to never getting caught in the speed trap in that little town in the middle of nowhere and ending up with a hefty fine and lots of point off your license! You just smile as you drive thru!
I want to share with you a very powerful method whereby you can utilize the power of your thoughts in conjunction with the Universal Laws.
Everyone puts out energy; we can "read" the energy of those around us. (This is best done with a still and quiet mind.) The energy of some folks is just lovely and we feel so good when we are in their presence. However, there are other people whose energy it is just plain nasty to be around. A good term I have heard to describe them is "energy vampires." We feel drained when we are around them and quite literally our own energy changes if we aren't careful and don't know what to do. If you are in a good space and "for no reason" begin to feel drained and kind of powerless, chances are you got zapped by one of those vampires. Be careful of the company you keep.
Of course if you can leave the physical presence of these negative folks, you owe it to yourself to do so! However, if you don't have the luxury of that choice ( Nasty Controlling Boss and I Need My Job!) there is something you can do to protect yourself.
This energy I have been speaking of is called an aura. An "aura" could be described as an invisible human energy system. It can actually be photographed. I have the fortunate experience of knowing someone in Green Bay, WI who does aura photography. A before and after picture (of some soothing healing work done) proved beyond a doubt that this stuff is real! We are living in an awesome time when science and the ancient sages come together. Physicists and brain researchers using advanced brain imagery might use a different language but they speak of the very same things. This is not new age "junk."
When you are feeling good and positive, it shows. (And can be aura-photographed as well as detected thru brain imagery). When you have been around a negative demeaning person (whose aura/brain image could also be photographed) your aura (or energy) changes. You feel down and depleted.
Now in the same way that we put up a shelter to protect our self from the energy of strong winds, we can create a block of the energy of that negative person. You are not doing this to harm the other person; it has no impact on him or her. It is really an act of self-protection and love.
So here is how to protect yourself from the negative energy emulating from others:
Quiet your mind.
Take several deep breaths....slowly.
Realize that you breathe in what you need-
breathe out what you don't need.
Imagine ( because thoughts create!) a protective bubble surrounding you.
See the color/s of the bubble...
Get a "feel" for the protective bubble and its size...
it's shape...
Know that no negative energy can enter or get through your protective energy bubble.
Your bubble is impenetrable.
You are safe from all negative energy and can go about your daily business.
Life is good.
Namaste
Until next time,
Dr. DyAnn
This is an area of life that I have studied for many years and I love to teach about it.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
True Love
It's Valentine's Day. A special time that we celebrate love. This is my message of love for you.
There are many people who are very easy to love. We simply enjoy being around them, soaking up their positive energy. But, let's face it - there are also those who get on our nerves and just rub us the wrong way. We all have those kind of people in our life too. And some of them get to us more than others: maybe the nosey neighbor, the perfectionist boss, the depressed co-worker, or the relative that treats you with disregard. These are the people who are much more difficult to love. Maybe even difficult to like!
"Liz" and I talked about how she has had some huge challenges lately with the kind of people that make it difficult for her to be around them. We talked about how she might deal with the various challenges. Being a good problem solver, she was able to set goals and make changes: becoming more assertive, keeping herself calm, practicing better self care.
Recently I asked her what she thought her lesson might be with all these challenges coming to her at once, as rapid fire as a machine gun! She answered that she thought she needed to practice her skills no matter what the situation.
I think our lessons are about something even deeper. They represent what we came here to learn. Our problems challenge us to look deep within our own self. The key is that we must look at how we are reacting to those problems. Our lessons are about more than handling stress or communicating better. At a more profound level they touch the core of our very being asking us to "remember" something.
At our center, each and every one of us is an amazing, empowered, lovable person.
Think about that. Let it soak in. Especially if you have been struggling lately, let those words touch the core of your being and remind you of what you have forgotten.
Remember. Sit in a quiet space and make it a special time of reflection . Quiet your mind. Remember....
Now, with that remembering will eventually come the realization that we are all one. Everyone is struggling in some capacity at one time or another. It is part of the learning - the ebb and flow of life.
When we bring to mind that we are all one, we can much more easily love those who seem not so lovable: that nosey neighbor may be lonely. The perfectionist boss may have pressures that we cannot envision. The depressed co-worker has lost the ability to believe. The disrespectful family member is lost in entanglement of childhood imprints.
When we can see others as being on a journey toward enlightenment, just as we are, life is much easier. We realize that some are walking blindly, some are discouraged, some are just beginning to awaken, and others are calmly but quietly aware.
It helps to realize that the other person's irritating habits are but an outward manifestation of their own inner struggle. It has nothing to do with you. There is no need to take it personally.
Along the path of enlightenment we come to realize that we are all one.
Namaste,
Dr. DyAnn
There are many people who are very easy to love. We simply enjoy being around them, soaking up their positive energy. But, let's face it - there are also those who get on our nerves and just rub us the wrong way. We all have those kind of people in our life too. And some of them get to us more than others: maybe the nosey neighbor, the perfectionist boss, the depressed co-worker, or the relative that treats you with disregard. These are the people who are much more difficult to love. Maybe even difficult to like!
"Liz" and I talked about how she has had some huge challenges lately with the kind of people that make it difficult for her to be around them. We talked about how she might deal with the various challenges. Being a good problem solver, she was able to set goals and make changes: becoming more assertive, keeping herself calm, practicing better self care.
Recently I asked her what she thought her lesson might be with all these challenges coming to her at once, as rapid fire as a machine gun! She answered that she thought she needed to practice her skills no matter what the situation.
I think our lessons are about something even deeper. They represent what we came here to learn. Our problems challenge us to look deep within our own self. The key is that we must look at how we are reacting to those problems. Our lessons are about more than handling stress or communicating better. At a more profound level they touch the core of our very being asking us to "remember" something.
At our center, each and every one of us is an amazing, empowered, lovable person.
Think about that. Let it soak in. Especially if you have been struggling lately, let those words touch the core of your being and remind you of what you have forgotten.
Remember. Sit in a quiet space and make it a special time of reflection . Quiet your mind. Remember....
Now, with that remembering will eventually come the realization that we are all one. Everyone is struggling in some capacity at one time or another. It is part of the learning - the ebb and flow of life.
When we bring to mind that we are all one, we can much more easily love those who seem not so lovable: that nosey neighbor may be lonely. The perfectionist boss may have pressures that we cannot envision. The depressed co-worker has lost the ability to believe. The disrespectful family member is lost in entanglement of childhood imprints.
When we can see others as being on a journey toward enlightenment, just as we are, life is much easier. We realize that some are walking blindly, some are discouraged, some are just beginning to awaken, and others are calmly but quietly aware.
It helps to realize that the other person's irritating habits are but an outward manifestation of their own inner struggle. It has nothing to do with you. There is no need to take it personally.
Along the path of enlightenment we come to realize that we are all one.
Namaste,
Dr. DyAnn
Thursday, February 12, 2009
The Gift of Love
As we approach Valentine's Day I am going to ask you to do two things: One is to let those people you care about know that you value them and their being in you life. I invite you to extend your message of appreciation beyond the traditional family members. Let your friends, co-workers and neighbors know that they touch your life.
Put yourself in the role of the recipient of this sort of message and you will soon see how important it will end up being. Think of how gratifying it would be to have these folks let you know that it's cool to have you as a neighbor or co-worker. And it would be even more meaningful if they added how much they enjoy your humor or spontaneity or that you can be counted on to be a team player at work. In other words, when you deliver the gift of appreciation, be specific as to what attribute it is that you notice and value.
I recently did this with a postal worker and I thought she would fall over! I couldn't help but notice as I waited in the long line that people were impatient and rather de-humanizing with the clerks behind the desk. Why do we do this?! Anyway, when I got to the front of the line the worker greeted me with a warm smile and friendly hello. I commented that her cheery greeting was a pleasant part of my day. I also told her that I always noticed her smile when I came to the post office because her smile is an exceptionally beautiful one. You would have thought I handed her a winning lottery check! I was so glad that I could make her day better. Who knows what rippling effect our energy and our words have. I guarantee your words of appreciation will make a difference to those in your life.
The second thing that I am going to ask you to do is to give your own self a gift. And that gift is that of working on replacing negative thoughts about yourself with positive ones. All of us have certain imprints or ways that we are triggered into negative thinking. The way the brain works is fascinating. I have written before about imprinting. Here is a classic case example.
Danny is the youngest child in his family of five. For some reason, his father practically disowned him. If there ever was a male "Cinderella" he would be it. When he was growing up he always got the brunt of his father's disrespect. Danny got the chores that were the dirtiest and most difficult. And as he recalls, he could never do enough; what he did do was never right. And sadly this all began when he was a very young child.
Because Danny was popular and well liked no one would ever have guessed that he had problems with low self esteem. We worked on looking at the roll those early messages and how they triggered him in the present. He got more adept at recognizing when he was being "triggered" by the echoes of the past.
The way the brain works is that there is an instant going back into the "files" of our memory when a stimulus presents itself. In Danny's case, when there was even the broadest hint of someone looking down on him (which is really the other person's issue - just like it was his father's issue) his mind would go back into those unconscious records and in effect say "Oh I remember this. I am useless. I am not well liked. I am powerless and not important."
It did not matter that Danny was now 35, well liked and accomplished. When this triggering took place via a casual remark the next step happened on auto-pilot. He would literally feel powerless, useless and unimportant. He would unconsciously buy into being a victim! It was as if he again was six years old and under his father's control.
Like Danny, we all have triggers and imprints and they all take place on auto-pilot. However, like Danny we can recover from them. That brings me back to the beginning of this writing when I asked you to replace negative thinking with more positive thoughts.
We become what we repeatedly think about. So, next time you catch yourself thinking anything but the kindest, most loving and respectful thoughts about yourself STOP! There are very good odds that you may have "learned" those negative judgments from someone in your pas: a sibling, teacher, parent, early childhood friend, spouse. When we are hurt by someone it is recorded in our memory. We adopt their words and judgments as our own. If we allow ourselves to dwell upon these words and judgments, we are being more unkind to ourselves than they were (or are) .
The reason I say this is : We cannot control what others think of us and say to us. But we have ultimate and complete control over what we allow ourselves to think about our own self! So be as kind to your own self as you would to a best friend. Using this wisdom is one of the best gifts of love you can give to yourself!
Enjoy! And happy Valentine's Day as you celebrate the love in your heart.
Namaste,
Blessings and love to you and those you love,
Dr. DyAnn
Put yourself in the role of the recipient of this sort of message and you will soon see how important it will end up being. Think of how gratifying it would be to have these folks let you know that it's cool to have you as a neighbor or co-worker. And it would be even more meaningful if they added how much they enjoy your humor or spontaneity or that you can be counted on to be a team player at work. In other words, when you deliver the gift of appreciation, be specific as to what attribute it is that you notice and value.
I recently did this with a postal worker and I thought she would fall over! I couldn't help but notice as I waited in the long line that people were impatient and rather de-humanizing with the clerks behind the desk. Why do we do this?! Anyway, when I got to the front of the line the worker greeted me with a warm smile and friendly hello. I commented that her cheery greeting was a pleasant part of my day. I also told her that I always noticed her smile when I came to the post office because her smile is an exceptionally beautiful one. You would have thought I handed her a winning lottery check! I was so glad that I could make her day better. Who knows what rippling effect our energy and our words have. I guarantee your words of appreciation will make a difference to those in your life.
The second thing that I am going to ask you to do is to give your own self a gift. And that gift is that of working on replacing negative thoughts about yourself with positive ones. All of us have certain imprints or ways that we are triggered into negative thinking. The way the brain works is fascinating. I have written before about imprinting. Here is a classic case example.
Danny is the youngest child in his family of five. For some reason, his father practically disowned him. If there ever was a male "Cinderella" he would be it. When he was growing up he always got the brunt of his father's disrespect. Danny got the chores that were the dirtiest and most difficult. And as he recalls, he could never do enough; what he did do was never right. And sadly this all began when he was a very young child.
Because Danny was popular and well liked no one would ever have guessed that he had problems with low self esteem. We worked on looking at the roll those early messages and how they triggered him in the present. He got more adept at recognizing when he was being "triggered" by the echoes of the past.
The way the brain works is that there is an instant going back into the "files" of our memory when a stimulus presents itself. In Danny's case, when there was even the broadest hint of someone looking down on him (which is really the other person's issue - just like it was his father's issue) his mind would go back into those unconscious records and in effect say "Oh I remember this. I am useless. I am not well liked. I am powerless and not important."
It did not matter that Danny was now 35, well liked and accomplished. When this triggering took place via a casual remark the next step happened on auto-pilot. He would literally feel powerless, useless and unimportant. He would unconsciously buy into being a victim! It was as if he again was six years old and under his father's control.
Like Danny, we all have triggers and imprints and they all take place on auto-pilot. However, like Danny we can recover from them. That brings me back to the beginning of this writing when I asked you to replace negative thinking with more positive thoughts.
We become what we repeatedly think about. So, next time you catch yourself thinking anything but the kindest, most loving and respectful thoughts about yourself STOP! There are very good odds that you may have "learned" those negative judgments from someone in your pas: a sibling, teacher, parent, early childhood friend, spouse. When we are hurt by someone it is recorded in our memory. We adopt their words and judgments as our own. If we allow ourselves to dwell upon these words and judgments, we are being more unkind to ourselves than they were (or are) .
The reason I say this is : We cannot control what others think of us and say to us. But we have ultimate and complete control over what we allow ourselves to think about our own self! So be as kind to your own self as you would to a best friend. Using this wisdom is one of the best gifts of love you can give to yourself!
Enjoy! And happy Valentine's Day as you celebrate the love in your heart.
Namaste,
Blessings and love to you and those you love,
Dr. DyAnn
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Transformation Information
Have you ever paid attention to how you express yourself? For example, when you want someone to know that y0u understand what they just said, which of the following ways might you say it? I see what you mean . I hear what you are saying. I'm with you. Each of these are examples of a preferred way of expressing our self that reveals how we take in and process information.
Most of us (70%) are visual or a combination that includes visual. Our conversations are riddled with references to "seeing" : I see what you mean. I don't see how you could think that. Why couldn't they see my side of things. It is easy for visual processors to picture things in their minds and to imagine things visually. Other people are auditory processors and some get the feel of things or are experiential.
You might want to "listen in" on conversations over the next couple of days to discover how you and other people express themselves. If you find an "information exchange barrier" going on in your conversation with someone, you might want to consider this information and utilize it to increase understanding. If your partner is not understanding you, try to discover if she or he is processing in a different way than your style. For example, giving an explanation to someone just by speaking words may fail (auditory); rather, try expressing by painting a visual picture. Use descriptions that a person might be able to imagine or see. This method might work better in conveying your idea because you would be utilizing visual aspects. Or you might find a way to show the person, thus using the experiential aspect. Play around with it and you might make some enriching discoveries.
There are other interesting facts about how we process information. We learn to process information in the first few months of our life. I was reading some research on this in regard to people who have been traumatized. Interesting, but not surprising, is the fact that children who have been traumatized do not learn to put things together in the same way as those who grow up to be well-adjusted adults.
It is my firm belief that many people have had traumatic experiences in life, but do not remember them. I am not talking so much about those who have suffered obvious abuse or neglect - as a defense mechanism they dissociate or repress their memories. What I am speaking of is what I have called "hidden trauma". An example might be a four year old in a wonderful family. She comes home from school and mommy and daddy ignore her as she shares the pretty picture she made. It was her first attempt at using paints, let's say.
In this example, what may occur is that the child puts two and two together with faulty addition. Being just a young child, she simply does not have the maturity to realize that mommy and daddy were preoccupied - deep in a conversation about bills. The child adds things up and comes to the erroneous conclusion that her ventures are just not important, and in fact she is not important. In understanding the brain this is called "imprinting."
Now I am not meaning that we have to walk on eggshells or that children are so fragile that a tiny episode could cause irreparable damage. Constant ignoring could very likely cause those conclusions of course. My point is that as we each were growing up, there were many incidents that were seemingly "normal" and non-damaging. However, depending on our age and stage of development, along with some other factors, we could well be carrying around some "hidden trauma" that caused imprinting on the brain . Remember - what you believe to be true, is true. And those beliefs start when our soul comes into existence..
Meg is a great example. She has everything going for her. She is happily married to a great guy. She is moving up in a career that she loves. But when I first saw her as a client I could see a hollowness in her eyes. She could not identify a "presenting problem" ; she described her life as one that many people would envy.
When we did the intake interview she had at first described her family of origin as warm and loving. However, when we looked further, we uncovered a pattern in which there were many memories of incidents when she felt anything but supported. Her brother teased her a lot and when he was supposed to be looking after her she felt she was very much on her own.
The subconscious mind holds all memories, recorded as if it happened yesterday. It also houses feelings. And remember as I have written before, the subconscious has no ability to reason or use logic. I call that a potentially hazardous mix. Memory + emotion minus logic! And as we grow up these memories and their partnering with strong feelings, become our imprints, whether we recall them or not. They are part of the blueprint we use to build and operate our lives!
The bottom line is this - short of finding a good hypnotherapist to go back and "rewire" those hidden memories, there is something you can and should do for yourself:
Spend quiet time and examine what you believe to be true about yourself, your childhood and the world in which you now live. Make up your mind which of those beliefs you want to keep and which do not suit you. This information is extremely powerful. It is at the heart of the message in Romans 12: You shall be transformed by the renewal of your mind.
You have been given one of the keys to happiness- whether you use it is all about free will. The choice is up to you.
Namaste
Dr. DyAnn
Most of us (70%) are visual or a combination that includes visual. Our conversations are riddled with references to "seeing" : I see what you mean. I don't see how you could think that. Why couldn't they see my side of things. It is easy for visual processors to picture things in their minds and to imagine things visually. Other people are auditory processors and some get the feel of things or are experiential.
You might want to "listen in" on conversations over the next couple of days to discover how you and other people express themselves. If you find an "information exchange barrier" going on in your conversation with someone, you might want to consider this information and utilize it to increase understanding. If your partner is not understanding you, try to discover if she or he is processing in a different way than your style. For example, giving an explanation to someone just by speaking words may fail (auditory); rather, try expressing by painting a visual picture. Use descriptions that a person might be able to imagine or see. This method might work better in conveying your idea because you would be utilizing visual aspects. Or you might find a way to show the person, thus using the experiential aspect. Play around with it and you might make some enriching discoveries.
There are other interesting facts about how we process information. We learn to process information in the first few months of our life. I was reading some research on this in regard to people who have been traumatized. Interesting, but not surprising, is the fact that children who have been traumatized do not learn to put things together in the same way as those who grow up to be well-adjusted adults.
It is my firm belief that many people have had traumatic experiences in life, but do not remember them. I am not talking so much about those who have suffered obvious abuse or neglect - as a defense mechanism they dissociate or repress their memories. What I am speaking of is what I have called "hidden trauma". An example might be a four year old in a wonderful family. She comes home from school and mommy and daddy ignore her as she shares the pretty picture she made. It was her first attempt at using paints, let's say.
In this example, what may occur is that the child puts two and two together with faulty addition. Being just a young child, she simply does not have the maturity to realize that mommy and daddy were preoccupied - deep in a conversation about bills. The child adds things up and comes to the erroneous conclusion that her ventures are just not important, and in fact she is not important. In understanding the brain this is called "imprinting."
Now I am not meaning that we have to walk on eggshells or that children are so fragile that a tiny episode could cause irreparable damage. Constant ignoring could very likely cause those conclusions of course. My point is that as we each were growing up, there were many incidents that were seemingly "normal" and non-damaging. However, depending on our age and stage of development, along with some other factors, we could well be carrying around some "hidden trauma" that caused imprinting on the brain . Remember - what you believe to be true, is true. And those beliefs start when our soul comes into existence..
Meg is a great example. She has everything going for her. She is happily married to a great guy. She is moving up in a career that she loves. But when I first saw her as a client I could see a hollowness in her eyes. She could not identify a "presenting problem" ; she described her life as one that many people would envy.
When we did the intake interview she had at first described her family of origin as warm and loving. However, when we looked further, we uncovered a pattern in which there were many memories of incidents when she felt anything but supported. Her brother teased her a lot and when he was supposed to be looking after her she felt she was very much on her own.
The subconscious mind holds all memories, recorded as if it happened yesterday. It also houses feelings. And remember as I have written before, the subconscious has no ability to reason or use logic. I call that a potentially hazardous mix. Memory + emotion minus logic! And as we grow up these memories and their partnering with strong feelings, become our imprints, whether we recall them or not. They are part of the blueprint we use to build and operate our lives!
The bottom line is this - short of finding a good hypnotherapist to go back and "rewire" those hidden memories, there is something you can and should do for yourself:
Spend quiet time and examine what you believe to be true about yourself, your childhood and the world in which you now live. Make up your mind which of those beliefs you want to keep and which do not suit you. This information is extremely powerful. It is at the heart of the message in Romans 12: You shall be transformed by the renewal of your mind.
You have been given one of the keys to happiness- whether you use it is all about free will. The choice is up to you.
Namaste
Dr. DyAnn
Friday, January 30, 2009
You're So Sensitive
"You're Soooo Sensitive!" Has anyone ever said that to you? It normally is said as an accusation- kind of like having a skin rash no one wants to get near. It makes you feel bad - like there is something wrong with you because of your sensitivity. And certainly there may have been times you agreed with your accuser, wishing you didn't cry, feel so emotional or become upset so easily.
Sensitivity is not a bad thing! When it controls us, yes, we need to do something so that we don't get thrown off balance. However, I truly believe that we need more sensitivity and sensitive people in this world, not fewer.
I recently met a delightful woman - I will call her Carrie. She is energized, open to sharing ideas, and has a calm confident way about her. She has a quick, easy smile that instantly puts a person at ease and makes you want to be around her. Carrie shared with me that she beat Cancer with ease and I was not surprised. When I asked her how she did it she said it had a lot to do with her attitude. (That is one of the Truths or Laws of the Universe... attitude, or belief is 90% of what causes success or failure. That isn't a scientific number by the way, so don't quote me on it!)
Karrie shared with me that she was dealing with her last child leaving home. She is having a really difficult time with it. She is perplexed because she can not get a sense of control over her emotions. She asked me my opinion as to why she could beat something as difficult as Cancer, and yet have such a difficult time with emotions. She revealed that whenever anything was upsetting to her she lost her confidence and her emotions were all over the place.
Folks, this is how I see it. Carrie and many people like her have been accused of being overly sensitive. Often times it starts in childhood, with parents either directly or indirectly letting us know that our emotions are not OK. Some of the time it is with good intention, so that we can be "tougher" and handle the world out there. But the message none-the-less comes across that there is something not right about us.
People with a high emotional ratings often times are the most benevolent, compassionate people we know. They truly can empathize with us and almost literally put themselves in our shoes. They respond to our pain with real emotion. Sound like you? If so, then it is time to be thankful that you have this gift. Yes, I said gift. People who are "sensitives" often times pick up feelings and even information that other people are not even aware of. Call it instinct or "gut feelings" (the gut is sometimes called the second brain). But because they have not been encouraged and taught properly about their feelings, they denounce their innate ability. Some of you may be sensitives who buried that part of your self.
No doubt this gift is a double-edged sword and we must learn how to handle it correctly. Rather than trying to extinguish the flame of sensitivity, one must learn to cherish the ability and utilize it to make the world a better place. At the same time, there is a need to block out the harmful negative energy of others whose exchanges are- shall we say "insensitive" at best. This can be done in many different ways. If possible, remove yourself from the physical space of a negative person/people. If that is not possible, simply imagine that you are surrounded by God's love, light or an impenetrable invisible bubble.
There is scientific research that backs the positive outcome of this seemingly silly response. The reason it works is that the imagination is stored in the powerful subconscious part of the mind. What we imagine to be true (such as the protective bubble that will not allow the words or energy to harm us) becomes true. This is but one practical application of the laws of the Universe.
Namaste,
Until next time,
Dr. DyAnn
Sensitivity is not a bad thing! When it controls us, yes, we need to do something so that we don't get thrown off balance. However, I truly believe that we need more sensitivity and sensitive people in this world, not fewer.
I recently met a delightful woman - I will call her Carrie. She is energized, open to sharing ideas, and has a calm confident way about her. She has a quick, easy smile that instantly puts a person at ease and makes you want to be around her. Carrie shared with me that she beat Cancer with ease and I was not surprised. When I asked her how she did it she said it had a lot to do with her attitude. (That is one of the Truths or Laws of the Universe... attitude, or belief is 90% of what causes success or failure. That isn't a scientific number by the way, so don't quote me on it!)
Karrie shared with me that she was dealing with her last child leaving home. She is having a really difficult time with it. She is perplexed because she can not get a sense of control over her emotions. She asked me my opinion as to why she could beat something as difficult as Cancer, and yet have such a difficult time with emotions. She revealed that whenever anything was upsetting to her she lost her confidence and her emotions were all over the place.
Folks, this is how I see it. Carrie and many people like her have been accused of being overly sensitive. Often times it starts in childhood, with parents either directly or indirectly letting us know that our emotions are not OK. Some of the time it is with good intention, so that we can be "tougher" and handle the world out there. But the message none-the-less comes across that there is something not right about us.
People with a high emotional ratings often times are the most benevolent, compassionate people we know. They truly can empathize with us and almost literally put themselves in our shoes. They respond to our pain with real emotion. Sound like you? If so, then it is time to be thankful that you have this gift. Yes, I said gift. People who are "sensitives" often times pick up feelings and even information that other people are not even aware of. Call it instinct or "gut feelings" (the gut is sometimes called the second brain). But because they have not been encouraged and taught properly about their feelings, they denounce their innate ability. Some of you may be sensitives who buried that part of your self.
No doubt this gift is a double-edged sword and we must learn how to handle it correctly. Rather than trying to extinguish the flame of sensitivity, one must learn to cherish the ability and utilize it to make the world a better place. At the same time, there is a need to block out the harmful negative energy of others whose exchanges are- shall we say "insensitive" at best. This can be done in many different ways. If possible, remove yourself from the physical space of a negative person/people. If that is not possible, simply imagine that you are surrounded by God's love, light or an impenetrable invisible bubble.
There is scientific research that backs the positive outcome of this seemingly silly response. The reason it works is that the imagination is stored in the powerful subconscious part of the mind. What we imagine to be true (such as the protective bubble that will not allow the words or energy to harm us) becomes true. This is but one practical application of the laws of the Universe.
Namaste,
Until next time,
Dr. DyAnn
Monday, January 26, 2009
Beth's Dream
There was a really great book before The Secret and others like it that have sprung up like mushrooms on a damp forest floor since it was published. The big deal about this new book is the promise of dreams and wishes coming true. While I do like the basic idea that it discusses I must confess that I am a little disappointed in it. This is simply because it presents the information as though all one has to do is wish and whatever the dream is, it comes true.
Yes, in its simplest form the book's information is true. But I am afraid some damage may have been done in creating disillusionment in those who read it without fully understanding it; thus their wishes did not come to fruition. But, we should not be discouraged about dreams coming true. The underlying power of creative forces is the subconscious mind. Yes, YOUR subconscious mind. Many people, both famous and every day folks like you and me are living proof of this.
Since "Beth" was very young she dreamed of becoming a therapist. But how was that ever going to happen for a 21 year old with no education and two babies? Beth sold Avon and grew to love the people on her route. She would find herself spending a lot of time listening to their problems. She was a very successful sales lady in spite of her breaking all the rules and being more interested in her customers' stories than selling them her products. She rose to the top of her field and won many awards for her sales without even trying. But after ten years she knew she just could no longer do it. She was bored and frustrated and "needed something different."
Realizing that her resume would give her a shot only at sales, she decided to take a couple of courses at a local junior college. The rest was history; studying psychology and sociology was inspiring and uplifting. She had a better insight into her customers' problems and a hint of how she might have helped. But once she earned her associate degree she reached a dead end. She won a scholarship to a larger school but it was over an hour away and getting a higher education had never been part of the plan - or the family budget! It all seemed quite impossible.
Still, she felt so deeply drawn to the field of psychology. She often found herself daydreaming of having a beautiful office where people could come and feel safe enough to talk about what troubled them. A place where she really could help them. Beth "put out a fleece" to ask God/the Universe what she should do, believing she would receive the direction and the help she needed in order to live a purposeful life. And she made it really tough to get a "yes" answer for a counseling career. Years later, Beth still has the physical evidence of the "yes" answer she received. It serves as a physical reminder during those times that she begins to forget the magnificence of working with the Universal Laws, God, and our creative subconscious mind.
And I should know, because in actuality I am the "Beth" in this story. What I thought was merely a far off dream which I could never attain became my reality. I have enjoyed a very successful private practice for many years and now enjoy helping others in even more ways than I could have imagined. This blog is just one of them...
In future blogs I will share how I helped to make my wildest dreams come true by using Universal Laws - even before I knew what that term meant! You will be able to apply those principles to understand and enhance your life.
Until then- dream!
And you might enjoy the dream poem on my website buechlertherapy.com
Blessings and love to you and those you love,
Dr. DyAnn
Yes, in its simplest form the book's information is true. But I am afraid some damage may have been done in creating disillusionment in those who read it without fully understanding it; thus their wishes did not come to fruition. But, we should not be discouraged about dreams coming true. The underlying power of creative forces is the subconscious mind. Yes, YOUR subconscious mind. Many people, both famous and every day folks like you and me are living proof of this.
Since "Beth" was very young she dreamed of becoming a therapist. But how was that ever going to happen for a 21 year old with no education and two babies? Beth sold Avon and grew to love the people on her route. She would find herself spending a lot of time listening to their problems. She was a very successful sales lady in spite of her breaking all the rules and being more interested in her customers' stories than selling them her products. She rose to the top of her field and won many awards for her sales without even trying. But after ten years she knew she just could no longer do it. She was bored and frustrated and "needed something different."
Realizing that her resume would give her a shot only at sales, she decided to take a couple of courses at a local junior college. The rest was history; studying psychology and sociology was inspiring and uplifting. She had a better insight into her customers' problems and a hint of how she might have helped. But once she earned her associate degree she reached a dead end. She won a scholarship to a larger school but it was over an hour away and getting a higher education had never been part of the plan - or the family budget! It all seemed quite impossible.
Still, she felt so deeply drawn to the field of psychology. She often found herself daydreaming of having a beautiful office where people could come and feel safe enough to talk about what troubled them. A place where she really could help them. Beth "put out a fleece" to ask God/the Universe what she should do, believing she would receive the direction and the help she needed in order to live a purposeful life. And she made it really tough to get a "yes" answer for a counseling career. Years later, Beth still has the physical evidence of the "yes" answer she received. It serves as a physical reminder during those times that she begins to forget the magnificence of working with the Universal Laws, God, and our creative subconscious mind.
And I should know, because in actuality I am the "Beth" in this story. What I thought was merely a far off dream which I could never attain became my reality. I have enjoyed a very successful private practice for many years and now enjoy helping others in even more ways than I could have imagined. This blog is just one of them...
In future blogs I will share how I helped to make my wildest dreams come true by using Universal Laws - even before I knew what that term meant! You will be able to apply those principles to understand and enhance your life.
Until then- dream!
And you might enjoy the dream poem on my website buechlertherapy.com
Blessings and love to you and those you love,
Dr. DyAnn
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