Friday, December 23, 2011

Help for Holiday Success

It's almost Christmas! Beautiful music is playing in the background, UPS delivered last minute presents in time for Santa to give to loved ones, and as I sit here at dusk the neighborhood lights are about to come alive. There is magical energy in the air.
People are rushing around doing the last minute preparation and frankly I should be doing the same. However, as I was taking a break and reading a Christmas card I was rendered a bit speechless as I read the enclosed note.
"Mary" commented how meaningful she finds my blog. Oh my goodness I haven't written anything in ages - I felt instant guilt combined with a rush of true joy in that I helped provide meaning in someones life.
So my friends, with cleaning to do, presents to wrap, calls to make and errands to run, I decided to let my heart lead the way: thus a holiday message as a gift to you.
I have been around long enough to experience many Christmas seasons~ the good, the bad and yes even the sort of ewww "not so good" ! I remember my husband and I rushing to get in a visit with both sets of families even though they lived miles apart. I smile as I recall great secret gifts and the look of sheer delight on the face of the surprised loved ones who had no idea what we were plotting. The years flew by with my sons growing up and presents that grew with them in size, price, and technology. And now we are blessed with grand children so that the entire process begins anew. As you read this I hope you take a walk down memory lane, remembering all the love, joy, and preparation that went into your holiday seasons.
It is the MEMORIES that last after all ~ isn't it?
From the perspective of many Christmas seasons there are a few things that I have learned and put into practice that make my holiday much more of a success and much more relaxing:
1. Define what will make this season successful for YOU. Over the years, when I realized I could not keep up with ALL the things I love, from Christmas cards to home made cookies, to the perfect gifts, to entertaining, etc etc WOW...and that instead I could prioritize and put my effort into what meant the most, and actually enjoy myself it made a huge difference. It helps to come from a perspective that makes sense to you! Choose the traditions which mean the most or start some new ones. People change, circumstances change, and so can you :)
2.Take care of yourself! I meditate and read uplifting materials just about every day of the year. It is how I start my day and I always joke that my clients and my family can tell the difference when I haven't given myself that boost. I call it "feeding my soul". When we are rushed, this is when we most need to remember good self care, if for no other reason than to maintain our energy.
3. I will be honest and say that I exercise only about 3 days a week and it is a struggle- but I know from a mind/body perspective that it is vital that we get up and move. Please do this for yourself. Walking is one of the best exercises there is- maybe take a look this evening at the neighborhood lights!
4. I have been very interested in the energy of good ole H2O. There is fascinating research on water crystals done by Dr Emoto out of Japan. If you take two identical vials of water and write negative words on one, but positive words on the other.....only the one with the + words will develop beautiful, intricate crystals. (Even muddied water will clear up by the way. This is about positive energy at its most basic.) Now think about it--- our body is what? 70%+ % water. So, drink lots of water and give yourself the message of beautiful words and thoughts.
5. It's the holidays so if you want to eat yummy but kind of junky food a.) don't over do it and b.) let it go!!! It's OK to treat yourself. You would actually do more damage by berating yourself than by eating the occasional not-so-nutritious food anyway.
6. Realize that gifts don't have to be "perfect". When you give someone a present that is an expression of caring. There are many ways to show that we love people besides a package under the tree. Many folks are struggling with the economy but please, please do not put a price tag on your love and admiration. Some of the best gifts I have even received were those where the person "pegged" it: maybe they knew a pound of my favorite chocolate from out of town would be oh so appreciated. Or they developed a favorite photo and put it in a simple frame or wrote something in a card about how I touched their life. Those are the kind of things we remember when the tree is down and everything is put away.
7. If your heart is carrying grief this year ~ whatever the reason: dig deep into your spiritual values. A new friend told me her dad died a couple months ago. She and her sisters are going to all be home to be with their mother. After we chatted a bit about her father and what a good man he was she said: I am confident Dad truly is in heaven and that makes me happy for him; I suppose we really are sad for ourselves. The mother of a dear friend died a few weeks ago and I know her family has struggled with Christmas without her. There is no getting around it, that first Christmas especially, is difficult. Share memories and pictures, be with loved ones who will supportive and be careful not to isolate. Getting back into a routine that makes sense to you and your timing will be important. Grief is like a roller coaster ride with unexpected ups and downs, but eventually it settles down.
8. Unburden your heart: forgive. The longer we hold on to the hurts and pain, the more it literally hurts us. I know it can be difficult to let go of injustices and what may appear to be unfairness or the thoughtlessness of others. We have all been there! But what happened is done and gone; when we keep it in our mind we are the ones who are keeping it and its emotional, mental and physiological scars ripped open. Forgiveness lets someone out of jail ~ and that someone is YOU.
9. Keep a sense of humor and positive perspective. Our "fresh" tree starting shedding needles like leaves coming off the autumn trees in a blustery wind. We bought it late as we have guests coming in for our celebration the weekend after New Years Day. Looks like it is going to be one of those "Charlie Brown" trees and and the clothing gifts are going to have needles tucked in their seams! But family and friends will be here sharing the season and the gifts of love and gratitude. And that is what makes the season something special!
10. Do one special thing for yourself: it will be your gift to you. The positive way we treat our self will then reflect like the warm sun on those around us. Scripture tells us that we are to love others as our self ; that is one of the great commandments! Even if you don't do it right away but make the promise to yourself it will give you something to look forward to with joy.
Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. It brought me great joy to take a break, think of you and share my thoughts during this special time of the year.
Best wishes for a lasting season of blessings.
With love and gratitude~
DyAnn

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Your Telepathic Communication

Ever wish you could do a better job in communicating with others? Maybe even that you could be telepathic and truly know what was in the other person's heart? Read on and you may discover that you already have that gift!
First I have one other thing to say ...with a cup of tea ( I am coffee'd out) and a granola bar, I sit here at my computer. I have missed writing my blog and feel a little guilty for letting it lag. My sincere apology if you have been looking for it - I really wasn't trying for a world's record of writer's block. One of the downsides of writing a blog is that I don't always know whose life I may have touched. Making the world, or my little piece of it, a better place in which to live, is a driving force in my life. So I got wrapped up in other projects. However, one of the things I know and believe in, is the importance of following those internal inklings that advise us to do this or that - go here or there. "Listen to the still, small voice within."
And so today - a calling to write. If there is even one person for whom it makes any kind of difference I am deeply blessed.
One of the things I do daily is read. I read for entertainment, for my own learning, and to feed my soul. I confess I have a love affair with words. I would like to share with you a passage from one of the books I particularly enjoy. I hope it provides inspiration, a sense of peace or guidance for you, as well as a hint about telepathy.
My copy of "A Return to Love" (Marianne Williamson) is battered and worn, with underlines in pen and pencil, my own notes in the column, and coffee stains here and there. In other words this is one of my favorites!

Here is an interesting passage in her chapter on relationships: We all have been in conversations where two people spoke and no one heard a thing. We've also had conversations where no one said anything and both people understood everything perfectly. In order to truly communicate we must take responsibility for the heart space that exists between us and another. It is that heart space, or the absence of it, which will determine whether communication is miraculous or fearful....the key to communication is not what we say, but rather the attitude that lies behind what we say. Since there is only one mind, all of us are telepathically communicating all the time. Every moment we are choosing to join or to separate, and the person to whom we are speaking feels what we have chosen regardless of our words. (p141)
In a skype session this morning I spoke with someone (I will call her Gracie) whose family participates in a lot of triangulating, back biting and gossip. If you don't attend a family event you know you will be a target of the gossip machine. But Gracie has come to a point in her counseling and enlightenment process where she no longer wants to participate in those family games.It extracts too high a price. She recently (bravely) skipped a family gathering. She was hurt and offended when someone in her family ("Jane") gave her own version/perspective at that gathering of something Gracie had said to her. And she painted a pretty nasty picture of Gracie, gossiping about her behind her back. Remember Gracie was not there to defend herself or give her version. And true to family form, that gossip later got back to her. Gracie wanted to set the record straight with Jane and let her know what she had meant when she made the comment to her.( Jane had not given any clue to Gracie that she was bothered by it; she chose rather to scathingly report it to the family - ouch).
Gracie shared with me the meaning of what she had said to Jane. Her question to me was whether or not it was wise to have a chat about it with Jane. (We discovered there was a way for Gracie to do this without Jane catching on as to who let the cat out of the bag and reported her gossiping about Gracie. Thus Gracie could avoid stirring the pot and creating more drama.) This was a troublesome issue that now had festered and caused an unspoken distance between her and Jane. Gracie no longer trusted Jane even tho Jane acted very nice "to her face". But I had one question before Gracie made her decision.
The question I asked Gracie was this: what is your intention in talking to Jane?

Our intention, you see, is what makes all the difference. Our intention is what creates the silently read fear or miracle. The joining or separation as Marianne is speaking of in the above quote. Remember on some level we all are telepathic. We do read the other person's intention- we read their heart. And they read ours.
So whether or not I would support Gracie in talking to Jane depended on the intention in her heart. The words would not matter nearly as much.
Her intention was pure. It was not to win the argument, prove she was right and Jane was wrong or to call her on her gossiping. It was simply to clear the negative energy and hurt.
In your own communication remember that often times we are so busy listening to the words that we may miss the true meaning or intention behind the words. Or we may be so busy pushing our own agenda that we are not hearing the other person, and they are not hearing us. We all have experienced these scenarios.
But if you want to truly "win" at communicating, make good the intention of what you want to say. Make it a desire to clear the negative and to make your world a little happier, more pleasant, more loving place in which to live. Because we truly are of "one Mind", on some level the other person will receive your intention. Whether they decide to honor it or not is up to them. We have no control there. But we really don't need that control - if our heart's intention is loving we have made the world- your world - a better place in which to live.
A sure way we can give our best attempt at making it a win-win communication is when we clear our own heart space of fear whether in the form of anger, jealousy, resentment of devaluing our own self. Once we have done that we win and we offer the best opportunity for the other person to win as well- the choice is up to them.
And that is just what Gracie did- her intention was simply to let Jane know that what she had said may have been in poor judgment, and that it was not meant to be mean-spirited or hurtful. Whether Jane understands it or not, Gracie has no control over. But on a higher level Jane will know that Gracie's intention is to heal, not hurt. To join rather than separate. And to create an environment of love not fear. It is only in this way that any true communicating can take place.

And remember also that it is a law of the Universe that what we put out there will eventually return to us - maybe a different day and in a different form or with a different person, but your pure intention of peace WILL come back to you.
Love and Light~
Until next time,
Dr. DyAnn








Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Guideposts for an Amazing Life

More today on the law of attraction.
I want to share with you some bits and pieces. Each is important in its own right. It is quite likely that there will be something here just for you that you can use starting right now.
For example, you realize that you can think only one thought at a time, right? Yes there are times when it seems as though a million thoughts are going thru our mind at once but in truth only one is there at a time. Strive to make it a positive one.
When we want to attract good things into our life, and who doesn't, it is important to be aware of our thoughts. So if you find yourself thinking negatively, immediately put a positive thought into play. It does not need to be something profound - just something in your own words. And like your mother probably always said "don't lie!" The Universeand your subconscious mind always knows when we are fibbing.
Let me give you some examples. Say you are desiring a loving partner in your life and that is what you wish to attract. If you catch yourself thinking/saying "ya like that will happen."
your fantastic obedient subconscious mind obeys. It does not understand sarcasm and goes with what you say, think, and believe.
One of the ways to get around your disbelief, which will trip you up by the way, is to do what I call spoon feeding the subconscious mind. So you might say "well it would be nice if I met someone who would end up being a wonderful loving partner." That is certainly true, so the subconscious mind accepts it AND gets to work on creating your wish. It really is that simple and I have seen it happen over and over again. The subconscious cannot help but obey. As Edgar Cayce is known to have often said: mind is the builder.
Remember the subconscious mind is where the blueprint is built for everything you want in life. And like a blueprint for a house, you want only the best plan and products to go into it. The blueprint is your image or visualization, or what you have hoped and prayed for. So put conscious thought into exactly what it is that you want.
The building products are your thoughts and words. So guard well the thoughts you allow to come into your mind, both from the environment in which you find yourself as well as your own thoughts. Avoid negative people who pull you down. And if that cannot be done in some circumstances, imagine a protective barrier where by their energy cannot enter into the blueprint of your mind.
Knowing the methods behind how the mind works, you have all you need to build a wonderful, fulfilling life.
Until next time~ may you know the joys of creating an awesome life!
Dr. DyAnn

Monday, January 24, 2011

Boomerangs

Gayle is a lovely, engaging woman with a smile that lights up the room as well as a past that is peppered with ugly memories, pain and despair.That is what first brought her into the counseling process. Already having had two failed marriages she worked on the patterns and false beliefs she picked up from her abusive family of origin. Her mother had blamed her for everything that she could possibly conceive of and her father, rather than protecting her, taught her to do "whatever it takes" so that mom would not be upset - quite the impossible task! What an ugly combination and often a set up for failed relationships and some hard lessons when a girl grows up this way.

Gayle thought she had found the love of her life when she met Carl. When she first laid eyes on him she knew" he was the one" and I as well am a big believer in intuition. As their relationship progressed I commented that I thought she was even meant to be his teacher in this lifetime. But what a challenge he ended up being! Not easily daunted, she kept working on herself and the relationship - and I continued to believe it would turn out well. As the economy turned for the worse he became increasingly aloof, verbally abusive and difficult to get along with. Because she and I continued to work together she was able to buffer his actions and not get triggered so much by old patterns of self blame and perfectionism learned in childhood. "Carl is not your mother. You are a competent adult" I would remind her. (That was HER lesson.)

She was able to continue to reach out to him tho her esteem suffered. She dug into her savings to help with his struggling business and took on more work to help with the bills. Long before, she had told him that she "believed in his dreams and wanted to help make them come true." What love!
However, as he became more withdrawn and belligerent she finally had to face the facts. We drew up a game plan and timeline for her moving out if things did not improve, for now he was even jealous of her successes. I hoped that it might shock him into some kind of awareness as to how much he was hurting this amazing woman that he was VERY lucky to have in his life. She thought he was stubborn enough that he would never flinch. "I just can't deal with his negativity any more. He is pulling me down and I am afraid I won't be able to survive this." At the last attempt to communicate at least thru e mail he told her not to send anymore stupid #$%^&!! emails because he wasn't going to read them.
OK then!
The way the Universe operates is similar to a boomerang; in other words what you put out there comes back eventually - boomerang for boomerang. It isn't going to send back a refrigerator! So it can be a little tricky to keep positive when, as in Gayle's example, this kind of stuff is happening in your life. But it is necessary!
We live in a world of vibration. Everything has a vibration. We live in a world that is magnetic - like attracts like. That was a mainstay of the message of Jesus. And we can think only one thought at a time. When we put all of these truths together we have the formula for success in life. We have true empowerment.
For example, if we say we are going to try something but think or say it probably isn't going to work anyway - we send out the boomerang and expect the refrigerator to come to us on the return route. Remember only one thought can be sent out at a time and the negative one will cancel out the positive one. We cannot lie to God and we cannot lie to our subconscious mind, which is our great powerhouse. We can however work on our ability to believe in our power when coupled with God/Universe/Spirit/Creative Energy. And we can own our feelings. But one of the most powerful, and easiest things we can do is also free!! We can use our imagination.
That being said, as Gayle had done countless times, imagine yourself and how you will feel in the future with your goal being successfully met. Relish it in great detail using all your senses until you truly do feel it. This is especially powerful when it is done just before falling asleep at night and upon awakening, as well when you pray and or meditate. When you are doing a mundane task like dishes, or riding an exercise bike is an opportune time also.

Now for an update about Gayle. I think one of the things that may have had her stuck by the way was her being a little too willing to allow her own self-esteem to take such a hit so that she put up with too much for too long with Carl. God never wants us to dishonor our own being. Respecting herself (in thought/feeling and actions - aka vibration) first and foremost may have been her missing piece in the formula.
In a recent e mail she shared with me that indeed a miracle appears to be taking place. Carl has told her how much he values her and how lucky he is to have her! Romance is once again blooming for them. She is understandably cautious but feels much more positive about their future. She will fill me in on the rest of the details when we meet. I can hardly wait.
In the meantime I replied in my e mail : EXPECT A MIRACLE!

Until next time, envision your success and use that untapped power of your imagination to make your dreams come true.
Blessings and love to you and those you love~
Dr. DyAnn