What is the difference between a whisper and a shout...a whisper and a thought? Which is more powerful? Someone measured the distance a shout travels and determined "your voice carries barely fifty yards". Hmmmm my neighbor yelling for her kids out distances that measurement! In regard to our thoughts and how far they travel - oh my that is a whole different matter. Our thoughts travel around the world and assist in the creation of our life.
You would think that your thoughts are private, right? I have often joked with my clients "Aren't you glad you don't live in a comic strip where your thoughts are printed in a bubble above your head?!" You know, those kind of thoughts we all have such as when a friend blows you off for a second time: ("I don't even want to talk to you; you're such a @#$%!!") Or your spouse says something kind of "off": ("Do you live in a cave? You have GOT to be kidding me!") How about a boss ...("What the @##@!*. If s/he didn't have connections s/he would be soooo out of here. I can't believe I work for such a dip$$$$").
We've all had those sort of thoughts but hide behind the mask of niceness or compliance. I'm not saying that is bad - don't get me wrong. Thank God we don't live in cartoon land because thoughts based on raw emotion aren't the whole picture. They are only a part of what I call our "Internal Committee' or many ego states. We can have many, varied thoughts on one single subject. That's normal.
But those seemingly meaningless, harmless PRIVATE thoughts....they do travel further than inside your own head. They travel to your cells and turn on or off a multitude of switches that change your chemistry. Depending on the type of thoughts that can be good or bad....we can raise our own blood pressure with excessive worry or calm our self with remembering and playing back a time of personal joy and happiness. We have more control here than many of us realize.
But the really intriguing issue centers around the fact that thoughts are vibration- they travel as far and as fast as radio waves. No, people don't hear them with their ears - but still those vibrations are out there in "space". They are "heard' in some way. It has been established that thoughts create. This is where it gets to be fun and interesting. In my seminars and in some of my blogs I have talked about Dr Emoto, the highly respected Japanese scientist. He specializes and has published his research relating to water and our thoughts. Yes, regular water that is all around us and something like 70% of our body. As a quick review Dr Emoto did a fascinating study with two test tubes of water drawn from the same place. His research assistants were instructed to think positive loving thoughts around one of the tubes and in another area the same assistants thought negative, demeaning thoughts and words. Sounds kind of weird if you have never heard about the science of energy! The results were phenomenal. The water surrounded by positive thoughts grew beautiful crystal structures. The other - no, not at all. It was almost as if that water died. Think for a minute the implications in our own body, with the seemingly harmless thoughts we carry around....
Thoughts tend to become true based on the intensity of the emotion they carry and their duration. It is almost as if we hypnotize ourselves. As the old adage goes : if you believe it's true - it is true. Our repetitive thoughts bring the point home.
Not only that, but those thoughts we believe to be private? Not exactly. In a way we are all kind of "mind readers". We get a hunch about someone when we see them. And we sense danger where there is no proof there is danger- but we just know because the hair stands up on our arms. Or we have a vague feeling someone will call and sure enough the phone rings and it is them. I remember years ago when I suddenly had a really awful, restless feeling on a relaxing Saturday afternoon. The phone rang and I was told that my son had been involved in a car/bicycle accident (he was the one on the bike) and was in the hospital. Clients have told me about "knowing" things which did not make sense in a logical way. Sure enough they were right. You might even recall similar occurrences. Interesting, isn't it? How does that happen?!
Frank Laubeck in Prayer, the Mightiest Force in the World writes:
Thoughts are contagious. "What you whisper in secret," said Jesus, "shall be shouted from the rooftops." Yes even your thoughts shout though others may not know it is you who are shouting....Our thoughts are the threads weaving the garment which the world tomorrow will wear. You and I created a piece of tomorrow in our thoughts today.
What kind of garment are your thoughts weaving for your tomorrow?
We are all connected thru the web of life, thru what scientists now know is not just "empty space". The rhythm of life and the vibration of our thoughts intermingle with this web and carry their energy along its pathways. Our thoughts do very much touch the lives of others.We all know when we are in the presence of someone who loves and cares for us. We can sense it- that is built into us. The people I love dearly came to mind as I read Laubach's beautiful passage. The idea of my negative and positive thoughts eventually reaching them and weaving the world they live in inspired me to be more aware of my thoughts. After all, they really aren't private. They truly are powerful - immensely so. And I want to weave beautiful tomorrows for you.
May you be blessed and surrounded by beautiful thoughts and energy on your journey of life. May you bless yourself, those you love, and our world with your thoughts. It does not take a large percent of people to change the world, simply by the power of their thoughts. You DO make a difference. For that I am thankful!
Until next time,
Dr. DyAnn
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
A Movie That Can Change Your Life
Grab the popcorn, find a comfy seat and let's go see a fantastic movie. What would you choose from the movie menu? Have you seen any really great movies lately? I mean the kind where you can't wait to buy a copy of your own even if your DVD library is as small as mine. Have you ever been watching a movie and after a few scenes realized it wasn't worth your time? A well crafted movie takes us away from our seat in the theater or comfy place on the couch and transports us to a different time and place via our imagination. Our emotions are brought to the surface as we weep, chuckle, sigh with warm satisfaction or feel outrage.
If you would now, think about a movie you've especially enjoyed or found memorable..... notice how it transports you to a different time and place? As you recall it in even greater detail you might even begin the feel the emotions brought forth while the movie scenes dance before your eyes. A good suspense has you on the edge of your chair with your heart beating faster. A romance might find you feeling wistful or even anxious as you hope for a happy ending. "Dolphin Tales" had us cheering for the solution that would save the day. "War Horse" is a current movie which I have not had the courage to see; even the preview brings up strong emotion surrounding the deep heartfelt connection between me and my horses.
There is another highly emotional, trance-like movie we all watch. And it is featured in a movie theater we never leave! Yes, every one of us, every moment of our life~ and that is the movie in our mind. Our subconscious mind continually runs movies or movie clips. We could even name them based on commonly running themes:
My Relationship With My Hateful__________ (fill in the blank: boss, spouse, so-called-friend, mother, mother-in-law, neighbor ,family members, etc)
How Awful This _____________Is Going To Turn Out ( fill in the blank: project, day, weather, dinner, kid, game, illness, job, relationship, etc.)
My Aching ##!*#! ____________(top to bottom body scan for this list)
How Unfair It Is That ____________( I got stuck with taking care of _____, I have this job, I have no job, my boss sucks, my spouse is stupid, my kids don't care, nobody cares about me , "they" have all the advantages , I don't have enough, etc)
I can't move forward______because (of where I live, because no one will give me a break, I am too old, I'm too young, I am the wrong race, I don't have enough money, I have a rotten past, no one gets ahead, have you met my family!, I have no skills, not enough energy, no education, no one to encourage me, etc.)
STOP THE MOVIE! PLEASE STOP THE MOVIE!!
It's your movie theater! You are always in charge of what movie or preview is on your screen. ALWAYS. It is impossible for it to be any other way. Your subconscious mind is the library of movies but your conscious (thinking) mind manages the theater. You are controlling all of it. And just like the movies we recalled in the first paragraph, along with emotions they each can manifest, our movies impact us physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. If we can't exit the theater let's change the movie!
Playing any movie clips or themes (including those listed above) creates a self-fulfilling prophesy called your day, your mood, your physical self, your life.
How about changing the movie to something like this:
A Great Intelligence is Available to me.
You might want to read about the God Code and how our DNA literally reads or translates as "God/Eternal within the body" That trumps any real or imagined adversity in life.
My Intention is to be Loving.
Among the most clear cut laws of the Universe is that of "cause and effect." We reap what we sow. It's our intention which is the seed we sow. Think about a time you "made up your mind" to do something- you likely succeeded. On the other hand when we put forth a half-hearted effort/intention we don't expect nor do we get a decisive outcome. It is intention that is the determining factor.
Looking at the intention to be loving, when we react with hurt and anger toward an uncaring person or hurtful situation that is just a stumble. Practice makes perfect and we learn empowerment when we stop giving our power away to others via our emotions. But to intend to hurt the other person is a totally different matter. In one of my seminars I explained this using the example of bringing a pie to a new neighbor. One person may have the intention of welcoming them so that they don't feel alone. Another person brings the pie in order to gain possible advantage. Same kind of pie, very different intention!
Our intentions are powerful beyond what most people realize. It strongly directs our actions. Emotion added to intention is a real powerhouse. Thus if we intend to direct hatred toward someone, we will likely hit the target. But remember this! Most important is the fact that the seed -the spirit, the intention in which we think or speak or act comes back to us; it is sown in our own inner self; there it grows. This is a core message that many great teachers and mystics taught. In Eastern culture this is where "karma" comes in. So that pie may have manipulated your new neighbor, but in turn someone along the way will manipulate you.
One more movie suggestion ~
I Look For and Find Gratitude
The effects of gratitude or thankfulness leading to the release of powerful hormones which impact us at a physical, cellular level is well documented. We are flooded with happiness chemicals when we feel gratitude.It is as simple as that. If you were lucky enough to receive a present for Christmas that you really were hoping for, you have a recent memory of what I mean. Conversely, when we take on a negative attitude the opposite type of chemicals are released and run rampant within our bodies. Some research points toward this being the cause of dis-ease.
We don't have to be at the mercy of things turning our perfectly in order to "practice gratitude" and receive its wonderful rewards. And we don't need to have an abundance of money. We already live in abundance ~ but most of us don't claim it.
What does it cost, after all to stargaze, or check out books from the library, sit in a beautiful cathedral, or meditate by a lake or pond, see the shining diamonds in the snow, share a smile, or forward an inspiring or silly e-mail. We can work on and change a bad habit, reach out and find a new friend, make someone's load lighter, laugh with a child, find humor in a situation, treat ourselves with love and kindness, give a compliment, inspire and encourage others ~ the list of ways to release joy into the world in which we live is enchantingly endless.
We can start our day off with the blast of the alarm clock and jump out of bed, rushing around with our heart pounding and our mind jammed with thoughts of all we have to do....Or we can take a moment or two, lie there and welcome the day, being thankful for life, a roof over our head, enough food to eat, challenges to make us grow, beautiful past memories and the opportunity to make this day a good one via our intention.
The mind is its own place, and in itself can make heav'n of hell, a hell of heav'n. Milton (Paradise Lost).
What movie will you allow in your mind today? Remember, you own the theater - and that is something to be grateful for!
Until next time~
Dr. DyAnn
If you would now, think about a movie you've especially enjoyed or found memorable..... notice how it transports you to a different time and place? As you recall it in even greater detail you might even begin the feel the emotions brought forth while the movie scenes dance before your eyes. A good suspense has you on the edge of your chair with your heart beating faster. A romance might find you feeling wistful or even anxious as you hope for a happy ending. "Dolphin Tales" had us cheering for the solution that would save the day. "War Horse" is a current movie which I have not had the courage to see; even the preview brings up strong emotion surrounding the deep heartfelt connection between me and my horses.
There is another highly emotional, trance-like movie we all watch. And it is featured in a movie theater we never leave! Yes, every one of us, every moment of our life~ and that is the movie in our mind. Our subconscious mind continually runs movies or movie clips. We could even name them based on commonly running themes:
My Relationship With My Hateful__________ (fill in the blank: boss, spouse, so-called-friend, mother, mother-in-law, neighbor ,family members, etc)
How Awful This _____________Is Going To Turn Out ( fill in the blank: project, day, weather, dinner, kid, game, illness, job, relationship, etc.)
My Aching ##!*#! ____________(top to bottom body scan for this list)
How Unfair It Is That ____________( I got stuck with taking care of _____, I have this job, I have no job, my boss sucks, my spouse is stupid, my kids don't care, nobody cares about me , "they" have all the advantages , I don't have enough, etc)
I can't move forward______because (of where I live, because no one will give me a break, I am too old, I'm too young, I am the wrong race, I don't have enough money, I have a rotten past, no one gets ahead, have you met my family!, I have no skills, not enough energy, no education, no one to encourage me, etc.)
STOP THE MOVIE! PLEASE STOP THE MOVIE!!
It's your movie theater! You are always in charge of what movie or preview is on your screen. ALWAYS. It is impossible for it to be any other way. Your subconscious mind is the library of movies but your conscious (thinking) mind manages the theater. You are controlling all of it. And just like the movies we recalled in the first paragraph, along with emotions they each can manifest, our movies impact us physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. If we can't exit the theater let's change the movie!
Playing any movie clips or themes (including those listed above) creates a self-fulfilling prophesy called your day, your mood, your physical self, your life.
How about changing the movie to something like this:
A Great Intelligence is Available to me.
You might want to read about the God Code and how our DNA literally reads or translates as "God/Eternal within the body" That trumps any real or imagined adversity in life.
My Intention is to be Loving.
Among the most clear cut laws of the Universe is that of "cause and effect." We reap what we sow. It's our intention which is the seed we sow. Think about a time you "made up your mind" to do something- you likely succeeded. On the other hand when we put forth a half-hearted effort/intention we don't expect nor do we get a decisive outcome. It is intention that is the determining factor.
Looking at the intention to be loving, when we react with hurt and anger toward an uncaring person or hurtful situation that is just a stumble. Practice makes perfect and we learn empowerment when we stop giving our power away to others via our emotions. But to intend to hurt the other person is a totally different matter. In one of my seminars I explained this using the example of bringing a pie to a new neighbor. One person may have the intention of welcoming them so that they don't feel alone. Another person brings the pie in order to gain possible advantage. Same kind of pie, very different intention!
Our intentions are powerful beyond what most people realize. It strongly directs our actions. Emotion added to intention is a real powerhouse. Thus if we intend to direct hatred toward someone, we will likely hit the target. But remember this! Most important is the fact that the seed -the spirit, the intention in which we think or speak or act comes back to us; it is sown in our own inner self; there it grows. This is a core message that many great teachers and mystics taught. In Eastern culture this is where "karma" comes in. So that pie may have manipulated your new neighbor, but in turn someone along the way will manipulate you.
One more movie suggestion ~
I Look For and Find Gratitude
The effects of gratitude or thankfulness leading to the release of powerful hormones which impact us at a physical, cellular level is well documented. We are flooded with happiness chemicals when we feel gratitude.It is as simple as that. If you were lucky enough to receive a present for Christmas that you really were hoping for, you have a recent memory of what I mean. Conversely, when we take on a negative attitude the opposite type of chemicals are released and run rampant within our bodies. Some research points toward this being the cause of dis-ease.
We don't have to be at the mercy of things turning our perfectly in order to "practice gratitude" and receive its wonderful rewards. And we don't need to have an abundance of money. We already live in abundance ~ but most of us don't claim it.
What does it cost, after all to stargaze, or check out books from the library, sit in a beautiful cathedral, or meditate by a lake or pond, see the shining diamonds in the snow, share a smile, or forward an inspiring or silly e-mail. We can work on and change a bad habit, reach out and find a new friend, make someone's load lighter, laugh with a child, find humor in a situation, treat ourselves with love and kindness, give a compliment, inspire and encourage others ~ the list of ways to release joy into the world in which we live is enchantingly endless.
We can start our day off with the blast of the alarm clock and jump out of bed, rushing around with our heart pounding and our mind jammed with thoughts of all we have to do....Or we can take a moment or two, lie there and welcome the day, being thankful for life, a roof over our head, enough food to eat, challenges to make us grow, beautiful past memories and the opportunity to make this day a good one via our intention.
The mind is its own place, and in itself can make heav'n of hell, a hell of heav'n. Milton (Paradise Lost).
What movie will you allow in your mind today? Remember, you own the theater - and that is something to be grateful for!
Until next time~
Dr. DyAnn
Friday, December 23, 2011
Help for Holiday Success
It's almost Christmas! Beautiful music is playing in the background, UPS delivered last minute presents in time for Santa to give to loved ones, and as I sit here at dusk the neighborhood lights are about to come alive. There is magical energy in the air.
People are rushing around doing the last minute preparation and frankly I should be doing the same. However, as I was taking a break and reading a Christmas card I was rendered a bit speechless as I read the enclosed note.
"Mary" commented how meaningful she finds my blog. Oh my goodness I haven't written anything in ages - I felt instant guilt combined with a rush of true joy in that I helped provide meaning in someones life.
So my friends, with cleaning to do, presents to wrap, calls to make and errands to run, I decided to let my heart lead the way: thus a holiday message as a gift to you.
I have been around long enough to experience many Christmas seasons~ the good, the bad and yes even the sort of ewww "not so good" ! I remember my husband and I rushing to get in a visit with both sets of families even though they lived miles apart. I smile as I recall great secret gifts and the look of sheer delight on the face of the surprised loved ones who had no idea what we were plotting. The years flew by with my sons growing up and presents that grew with them in size, price, and technology. And now we are blessed with grand children so that the entire process begins anew. As you read this I hope you take a walk down memory lane, remembering all the love, joy, and preparation that went into your holiday seasons.
It is the MEMORIES that last after all ~ isn't it?
From the perspective of many Christmas seasons there are a few things that I have learned and put into practice that make my holiday much more of a success and much more relaxing:
1. Define what will make this season successful for YOU. Over the years, when I realized I could not keep up with ALL the things I love, from Christmas cards to home made cookies, to the perfect gifts, to entertaining, etc etc WOW...and that instead I could prioritize and put my effort into what meant the most, and actually enjoy myself it made a huge difference. It helps to come from a perspective that makes sense to you! Choose the traditions which mean the most or start some new ones. People change, circumstances change, and so can you :)
2.Take care of yourself! I meditate and read uplifting materials just about every day of the year. It is how I start my day and I always joke that my clients and my family can tell the difference when I haven't given myself that boost. I call it "feeding my soul". When we are rushed, this is when we most need to remember good self care, if for no other reason than to maintain our energy.
3. I will be honest and say that I exercise only about 3 days a week and it is a struggle- but I know from a mind/body perspective that it is vital that we get up and move. Please do this for yourself. Walking is one of the best exercises there is- maybe take a look this evening at the neighborhood lights!
4. I have been very interested in the energy of good ole H2O. There is fascinating research on water crystals done by Dr Emoto out of Japan. If you take two identical vials of water and write negative words on one, but positive words on the other.....only the one with the + words will develop beautiful, intricate crystals. (Even muddied water will clear up by the way. This is about positive energy at its most basic.) Now think about it--- our body is what? 70%+ % water. So, drink lots of water and give yourself the message of beautiful words and thoughts.
5. It's the holidays so if you want to eat yummy but kind of junky food a.) don't over do it and b.) let it go!!! It's OK to treat yourself. You would actually do more damage by berating yourself than by eating the occasional not-so-nutritious food anyway.
6. Realize that gifts don't have to be "perfect". When you give someone a present that is an expression of caring. There are many ways to show that we love people besides a package under the tree. Many folks are struggling with the economy but please, please do not put a price tag on your love and admiration. Some of the best gifts I have even received were those where the person "pegged" it: maybe they knew a pound of my favorite chocolate from out of town would be oh so appreciated. Or they developed a favorite photo and put it in a simple frame or wrote something in a card about how I touched their life. Those are the kind of things we remember when the tree is down and everything is put away.
7. If your heart is carrying grief this year ~ whatever the reason: dig deep into your spiritual values. A new friend told me her dad died a couple months ago. She and her sisters are going to all be home to be with their mother. After we chatted a bit about her father and what a good man he was she said: I am confident Dad truly is in heaven and that makes me happy for him; I suppose we really are sad for ourselves. The mother of a dear friend died a few weeks ago and I know her family has struggled with Christmas without her. There is no getting around it, that first Christmas especially, is difficult. Share memories and pictures, be with loved ones who will supportive and be careful not to isolate. Getting back into a routine that makes sense to you and your timing will be important. Grief is like a roller coaster ride with unexpected ups and downs, but eventually it settles down.
8. Unburden your heart: forgive. The longer we hold on to the hurts and pain, the more it literally hurts us. I know it can be difficult to let go of injustices and what may appear to be unfairness or the thoughtlessness of others. We have all been there! But what happened is done and gone; when we keep it in our mind we are the ones who are keeping it and its emotional, mental and physiological scars ripped open. Forgiveness lets someone out of jail ~ and that someone is YOU.
9. Keep a sense of humor and positive perspective. Our "fresh" tree starting shedding needles like leaves coming off the autumn trees in a blustery wind. We bought it late as we have guests coming in for our celebration the weekend after New Years Day. Looks like it is going to be one of those "Charlie Brown" trees and and the clothing gifts are going to have needles tucked in their seams! But family and friends will be here sharing the season and the gifts of love and gratitude. And that is what makes the season something special!
10. Do one special thing for yourself: it will be your gift to you. The positive way we treat our self will then reflect like the warm sun on those around us. Scripture tells us that we are to love others as our self ; that is one of the great commandments! Even if you don't do it right away but make the promise to yourself it will give you something to look forward to with joy.
Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. It brought me great joy to take a break, think of you and share my thoughts during this special time of the year.
Best wishes for a lasting season of blessings.
With love and gratitude~
DyAnn
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Your Telepathic Communication
Ever wish you could do a better job in communicating with others? Maybe even that you could be telepathic and truly know what was in the other person's heart? Read on and you may discover that you already have that gift!
First I have one other thing to say ...with a cup of tea ( I am coffee'd out) and a granola bar, I sit here at my computer. I have missed writing my blog and feel a little guilty for letting it lag. My sincere apology if you have been looking for it - I really wasn't trying for a world's record of writer's block. One of the downsides of writing a blog is that I don't always know whose life I may have touched. Making the world, or my little piece of it, a better place in which to live, is a driving force in my life. So I got wrapped up in other projects. However, one of the things I know and believe in, is the importance of following those internal inklings that advise us to do this or that - go here or there. "Listen to the still, small voice within."
And so today - a calling to write. If there is even one person for whom it makes any kind of difference I am deeply blessed.
One of the things I do daily is read. I read for entertainment, for my own learning, and to feed my soul. I confess I have a love affair with words. I would like to share with you a passage from one of the books I particularly enjoy. I hope it provides inspiration, a sense of peace or guidance for you, as well as a hint about telepathy.
My copy of "A Return to Love" (Marianne Williamson) is battered and worn, with underlines in pen and pencil, my own notes in the column, and coffee stains here and there. In other words this is one of my favorites!
Here is an interesting passage in her chapter on relationships: We all have been in conversations where two people spoke and no one heard a thing. We've also had conversations where no one said anything and both people understood everything perfectly. In order to truly communicate we must take responsibility for the heart space that exists between us and another. It is that heart space, or the absence of it, which will determine whether communication is miraculous or fearful....the key to communication is not what we say, but rather the attitude that lies behind what we say. Since there is only one mind, all of us are telepathically communicating all the time. Every moment we are choosing to join or to separate, and the person to whom we are speaking feels what we have chosen regardless of our words. (p141)
In a skype session this morning I spoke with someone (I will call her Gracie) whose family participates in a lot of triangulating, back biting and gossip. If you don't attend a family event you know you will be a target of the gossip machine. But Gracie has come to a point in her counseling and enlightenment process where she no longer wants to participate in those family games.It extracts too high a price. She recently (bravely) skipped a family gathering. She was hurt and offended when someone in her family ("Jane") gave her own version/perspective at that gathering of something Gracie had said to her. And she painted a pretty nasty picture of Gracie, gossiping about her behind her back. Remember Gracie was not there to defend herself or give her version. And true to family form, that gossip later got back to her. Gracie wanted to set the record straight with Jane and let her know what she had meant when she made the comment to her.( Jane had not given any clue to Gracie that she was bothered by it; she chose rather to scathingly report it to the family - ouch).
Gracie shared with me the meaning of what she had said to Jane. Her question to me was whether or not it was wise to have a chat about it with Jane. (We discovered there was a way for Gracie to do this without Jane catching on as to who let the cat out of the bag and reported her gossiping about Gracie. Thus Gracie could avoid stirring the pot and creating more drama.) This was a troublesome issue that now had festered and caused an unspoken distance between her and Jane. Gracie no longer trusted Jane even tho Jane acted very nice "to her face". But I had one question before Gracie made her decision.
The question I asked Gracie was this: what is your intention in talking to Jane?
Our intention, you see, is what makes all the difference. Our intention is what creates the silently read fear or miracle. The joining or separation as Marianne is speaking of in the above quote. Remember on some level we all are telepathic. We do read the other person's intention- we read their heart. And they read ours.
So whether or not I would support Gracie in talking to Jane depended on the intention in her heart. The words would not matter nearly as much.
Her intention was pure. It was not to win the argument, prove she was right and Jane was wrong or to call her on her gossiping. It was simply to clear the negative energy and hurt.
In your own communication remember that often times we are so busy listening to the words that we may miss the true meaning or intention behind the words. Or we may be so busy pushing our own agenda that we are not hearing the other person, and they are not hearing us. We all have experienced these scenarios.
But if you want to truly "win" at communicating, make good the intention of what you want to say. Make it a desire to clear the negative and to make your world a little happier, more pleasant, more loving place in which to live. Because we truly are of "one Mind", on some level the other person will receive your intention. Whether they decide to honor it or not is up to them. We have no control there. But we really don't need that control - if our heart's intention is loving we have made the world- your world - a better place in which to live.
A sure way we can give our best attempt at making it a win-win communication is when we clear our own heart space of fear whether in the form of anger, jealousy, resentment of devaluing our own self. Once we have done that we win and we offer the best opportunity for the other person to win as well- the choice is up to them.
And that is just what Gracie did- her intention was simply to let Jane know that what she had said may have been in poor judgment, and that it was not meant to be mean-spirited or hurtful. Whether Jane understands it or not, Gracie has no control over. But on a higher level Jane will know that Gracie's intention is to heal, not hurt. To join rather than separate. And to create an environment of love not fear. It is only in this way that any true communicating can take place.
And remember also that it is a law of the Universe that what we put out there will eventually return to us - maybe a different day and in a different form or with a different person, but your pure intention of peace WILL come back to you.
Love and Light~
Until next time,
Dr. DyAnn
First I have one other thing to say ...with a cup of tea ( I am coffee'd out) and a granola bar, I sit here at my computer. I have missed writing my blog and feel a little guilty for letting it lag. My sincere apology if you have been looking for it - I really wasn't trying for a world's record of writer's block. One of the downsides of writing a blog is that I don't always know whose life I may have touched. Making the world, or my little piece of it, a better place in which to live, is a driving force in my life. So I got wrapped up in other projects. However, one of the things I know and believe in, is the importance of following those internal inklings that advise us to do this or that - go here or there. "Listen to the still, small voice within."
And so today - a calling to write. If there is even one person for whom it makes any kind of difference I am deeply blessed.
One of the things I do daily is read. I read for entertainment, for my own learning, and to feed my soul. I confess I have a love affair with words. I would like to share with you a passage from one of the books I particularly enjoy. I hope it provides inspiration, a sense of peace or guidance for you, as well as a hint about telepathy.
My copy of "A Return to Love" (Marianne Williamson) is battered and worn, with underlines in pen and pencil, my own notes in the column, and coffee stains here and there. In other words this is one of my favorites!
Here is an interesting passage in her chapter on relationships: We all have been in conversations where two people spoke and no one heard a thing. We've also had conversations where no one said anything and both people understood everything perfectly. In order to truly communicate we must take responsibility for the heart space that exists between us and another. It is that heart space, or the absence of it, which will determine whether communication is miraculous or fearful....the key to communication is not what we say, but rather the attitude that lies behind what we say. Since there is only one mind, all of us are telepathically communicating all the time. Every moment we are choosing to join or to separate, and the person to whom we are speaking feels what we have chosen regardless of our words. (p141)
In a skype session this morning I spoke with someone (I will call her Gracie) whose family participates in a lot of triangulating, back biting and gossip. If you don't attend a family event you know you will be a target of the gossip machine. But Gracie has come to a point in her counseling and enlightenment process where she no longer wants to participate in those family games.It extracts too high a price. She recently (bravely) skipped a family gathering. She was hurt and offended when someone in her family ("Jane") gave her own version/perspective at that gathering of something Gracie had said to her. And she painted a pretty nasty picture of Gracie, gossiping about her behind her back. Remember Gracie was not there to defend herself or give her version. And true to family form, that gossip later got back to her. Gracie wanted to set the record straight with Jane and let her know what she had meant when she made the comment to her.( Jane had not given any clue to Gracie that she was bothered by it; she chose rather to scathingly report it to the family - ouch).
Gracie shared with me the meaning of what she had said to Jane. Her question to me was whether or not it was wise to have a chat about it with Jane. (We discovered there was a way for Gracie to do this without Jane catching on as to who let the cat out of the bag and reported her gossiping about Gracie. Thus Gracie could avoid stirring the pot and creating more drama.) This was a troublesome issue that now had festered and caused an unspoken distance between her and Jane. Gracie no longer trusted Jane even tho Jane acted very nice "to her face". But I had one question before Gracie made her decision.
The question I asked Gracie was this: what is your intention in talking to Jane?
Our intention, you see, is what makes all the difference. Our intention is what creates the silently read fear or miracle. The joining or separation as Marianne is speaking of in the above quote. Remember on some level we all are telepathic. We do read the other person's intention- we read their heart. And they read ours.
So whether or not I would support Gracie in talking to Jane depended on the intention in her heart. The words would not matter nearly as much.
Her intention was pure. It was not to win the argument, prove she was right and Jane was wrong or to call her on her gossiping. It was simply to clear the negative energy and hurt.
In your own communication remember that often times we are so busy listening to the words that we may miss the true meaning or intention behind the words. Or we may be so busy pushing our own agenda that we are not hearing the other person, and they are not hearing us. We all have experienced these scenarios.
But if you want to truly "win" at communicating, make good the intention of what you want to say. Make it a desire to clear the negative and to make your world a little happier, more pleasant, more loving place in which to live. Because we truly are of "one Mind", on some level the other person will receive your intention. Whether they decide to honor it or not is up to them. We have no control there. But we really don't need that control - if our heart's intention is loving we have made the world- your world - a better place in which to live.
A sure way we can give our best attempt at making it a win-win communication is when we clear our own heart space of fear whether in the form of anger, jealousy, resentment of devaluing our own self. Once we have done that we win and we offer the best opportunity for the other person to win as well- the choice is up to them.
And that is just what Gracie did- her intention was simply to let Jane know that what she had said may have been in poor judgment, and that it was not meant to be mean-spirited or hurtful. Whether Jane understands it or not, Gracie has no control over. But on a higher level Jane will know that Gracie's intention is to heal, not hurt. To join rather than separate. And to create an environment of love not fear. It is only in this way that any true communicating can take place.
And remember also that it is a law of the Universe that what we put out there will eventually return to us - maybe a different day and in a different form or with a different person, but your pure intention of peace WILL come back to you.
Love and Light~
Until next time,
Dr. DyAnn
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Guideposts for an Amazing Life
More today on the law of attraction.
I want to share with you some bits and pieces. Each is important in its own right. It is quite likely that there will be something here just for you that you can use starting right now.
For example, you realize that you can think only one thought at a time, right? Yes there are times when it seems as though a million thoughts are going thru our mind at once but in truth only one is there at a time. Strive to make it a positive one.
When we want to attract good things into our life, and who doesn't, it is important to be aware of our thoughts. So if you find yourself thinking negatively, immediately put a positive thought into play. It does not need to be something profound - just something in your own words. And like your mother probably always said "don't lie!" The Universeand your subconscious mind always knows when we are fibbing.
Let me give you some examples. Say you are desiring a loving partner in your life and that is what you wish to attract. If you catch yourself thinking/saying "ya like that will happen."
your fantastic obedient subconscious mind obeys. It does not understand sarcasm and goes with what you say, think, and believe.
One of the ways to get around your disbelief, which will trip you up by the way, is to do what I call spoon feeding the subconscious mind. So you might say "well it would be nice if I met someone who would end up being a wonderful loving partner." That is certainly true, so the subconscious mind accepts it AND gets to work on creating your wish. It really is that simple and I have seen it happen over and over again. The subconscious cannot help but obey. As Edgar Cayce is known to have often said: mind is the builder.
Remember the subconscious mind is where the blueprint is built for everything you want in life. And like a blueprint for a house, you want only the best plan and products to go into it. The blueprint is your image or visualization, or what you have hoped and prayed for. So put conscious thought into exactly what it is that you want.
The building products are your thoughts and words. So guard well the thoughts you allow to come into your mind, both from the environment in which you find yourself as well as your own thoughts. Avoid negative people who pull you down. And if that cannot be done in some circumstances, imagine a protective barrier where by their energy cannot enter into the blueprint of your mind.
Knowing the methods behind how the mind works, you have all you need to build a wonderful, fulfilling life.
Until next time~ may you know the joys of creating an awesome life!
Dr. DyAnn
I want to share with you some bits and pieces. Each is important in its own right. It is quite likely that there will be something here just for you that you can use starting right now.
For example, you realize that you can think only one thought at a time, right? Yes there are times when it seems as though a million thoughts are going thru our mind at once but in truth only one is there at a time. Strive to make it a positive one.
When we want to attract good things into our life, and who doesn't, it is important to be aware of our thoughts. So if you find yourself thinking negatively, immediately put a positive thought into play. It does not need to be something profound - just something in your own words. And like your mother probably always said "don't lie!" The Universeand your subconscious mind always knows when we are fibbing.
Let me give you some examples. Say you are desiring a loving partner in your life and that is what you wish to attract. If you catch yourself thinking/saying "ya like that will happen."
your fantastic obedient subconscious mind obeys. It does not understand sarcasm and goes with what you say, think, and believe.
One of the ways to get around your disbelief, which will trip you up by the way, is to do what I call spoon feeding the subconscious mind. So you might say "well it would be nice if I met someone who would end up being a wonderful loving partner." That is certainly true, so the subconscious mind accepts it AND gets to work on creating your wish. It really is that simple and I have seen it happen over and over again. The subconscious cannot help but obey. As Edgar Cayce is known to have often said: mind is the builder.
Remember the subconscious mind is where the blueprint is built for everything you want in life. And like a blueprint for a house, you want only the best plan and products to go into it. The blueprint is your image or visualization, or what you have hoped and prayed for. So put conscious thought into exactly what it is that you want.
The building products are your thoughts and words. So guard well the thoughts you allow to come into your mind, both from the environment in which you find yourself as well as your own thoughts. Avoid negative people who pull you down. And if that cannot be done in some circumstances, imagine a protective barrier where by their energy cannot enter into the blueprint of your mind.
Knowing the methods behind how the mind works, you have all you need to build a wonderful, fulfilling life.
Until next time~ may you know the joys of creating an awesome life!
Dr. DyAnn
Monday, January 24, 2011
Boomerangs
Gayle is a lovely, engaging woman with a smile that lights up the room as well as a past that is peppered with ugly memories, pain and despair.That is what first brought her into the counseling process. Already having had two failed marriages she worked on the patterns and false beliefs she picked up from her abusive family of origin. Her mother had blamed her for everything that she could possibly conceive of and her father, rather than protecting her, taught her to do "whatever it takes" so that mom would not be upset - quite the impossible task! What an ugly combination and often a set up for failed relationships and some hard lessons when a girl grows up this way.
Gayle thought she had found the love of her life when she met Carl. When she first laid eyes on him she knew" he was the one" and I as well am a big believer in intuition. As their relationship progressed I commented that I thought she was even meant to be his teacher in this lifetime. But what a challenge he ended up being! Not easily daunted, she kept working on herself and the relationship - and I continued to believe it would turn out well. As the economy turned for the worse he became increasingly aloof, verbally abusive and difficult to get along with. Because she and I continued to work together she was able to buffer his actions and not get triggered so much by old patterns of self blame and perfectionism learned in childhood. "Carl is not your mother. You are a competent adult" I would remind her. (That was HER lesson.)
She was able to continue to reach out to him tho her esteem suffered. She dug into her savings to help with his struggling business and took on more work to help with the bills. Long before, she had told him that she "believed in his dreams and wanted to help make them come true." What love!
However, as he became more withdrawn and belligerent she finally had to face the facts. We drew up a game plan and timeline for her moving out if things did not improve, for now he was even jealous of her successes. I hoped that it might shock him into some kind of awareness as to how much he was hurting this amazing woman that he was VERY lucky to have in his life. She thought he was stubborn enough that he would never flinch. "I just can't deal with his negativity any more. He is pulling me down and I am afraid I won't be able to survive this." At the last attempt to communicate at least thru e mail he told her not to send anymore stupid #$%^&!! emails because he wasn't going to read them.
OK then!
The way the Universe operates is similar to a boomerang; in other words what you put out there comes back eventually - boomerang for boomerang. It isn't going to send back a refrigerator! So it can be a little tricky to keep positive when, as in Gayle's example, this kind of stuff is happening in your life. But it is necessary!
We live in a world of vibration. Everything has a vibration. We live in a world that is magnetic - like attracts like. That was a mainstay of the message of Jesus. And we can think only one thought at a time. When we put all of these truths together we have the formula for success in life. We have true empowerment.
For example, if we say we are going to try something but think or say it probably isn't going to work anyway - we send out the boomerang and expect the refrigerator to come to us on the return route. Remember only one thought can be sent out at a time and the negative one will cancel out the positive one. We cannot lie to God and we cannot lie to our subconscious mind, which is our great powerhouse. We can however work on our ability to believe in our power when coupled with God/Universe/Spirit/Creative Energy. And we can own our feelings. But one of the most powerful, and easiest things we can do is also free!! We can use our imagination.
That being said, as Gayle had done countless times, imagine yourself and how you will feel in the future with your goal being successfully met. Relish it in great detail using all your senses until you truly do feel it. This is especially powerful when it is done just before falling asleep at night and upon awakening, as well when you pray and or meditate. When you are doing a mundane task like dishes, or riding an exercise bike is an opportune time also.
Now for an update about Gayle. I think one of the things that may have had her stuck by the way was her being a little too willing to allow her own self-esteem to take such a hit so that she put up with too much for too long with Carl. God never wants us to dishonor our own being. Respecting herself (in thought/feeling and actions - aka vibration) first and foremost may have been her missing piece in the formula.
In a recent e mail she shared with me that indeed a miracle appears to be taking place. Carl has told her how much he values her and how lucky he is to have her! Romance is once again blooming for them. She is understandably cautious but feels much more positive about their future. She will fill me in on the rest of the details when we meet. I can hardly wait.
In the meantime I replied in my e mail : EXPECT A MIRACLE!
Until next time, envision your success and use that untapped power of your imagination to make your dreams come true.
Blessings and love to you and those you love~
Dr. DyAnn
Gayle thought she had found the love of her life when she met Carl. When she first laid eyes on him she knew" he was the one" and I as well am a big believer in intuition. As their relationship progressed I commented that I thought she was even meant to be his teacher in this lifetime. But what a challenge he ended up being! Not easily daunted, she kept working on herself and the relationship - and I continued to believe it would turn out well. As the economy turned for the worse he became increasingly aloof, verbally abusive and difficult to get along with. Because she and I continued to work together she was able to buffer his actions and not get triggered so much by old patterns of self blame and perfectionism learned in childhood. "Carl is not your mother. You are a competent adult" I would remind her. (That was HER lesson.)
She was able to continue to reach out to him tho her esteem suffered. She dug into her savings to help with his struggling business and took on more work to help with the bills. Long before, she had told him that she "believed in his dreams and wanted to help make them come true." What love!
However, as he became more withdrawn and belligerent she finally had to face the facts. We drew up a game plan and timeline for her moving out if things did not improve, for now he was even jealous of her successes. I hoped that it might shock him into some kind of awareness as to how much he was hurting this amazing woman that he was VERY lucky to have in his life. She thought he was stubborn enough that he would never flinch. "I just can't deal with his negativity any more. He is pulling me down and I am afraid I won't be able to survive this." At the last attempt to communicate at least thru e mail he told her not to send anymore stupid #$%^&!! emails because he wasn't going to read them.
OK then!
The way the Universe operates is similar to a boomerang; in other words what you put out there comes back eventually - boomerang for boomerang. It isn't going to send back a refrigerator! So it can be a little tricky to keep positive when, as in Gayle's example, this kind of stuff is happening in your life. But it is necessary!
We live in a world of vibration. Everything has a vibration. We live in a world that is magnetic - like attracts like. That was a mainstay of the message of Jesus. And we can think only one thought at a time. When we put all of these truths together we have the formula for success in life. We have true empowerment.
For example, if we say we are going to try something but think or say it probably isn't going to work anyway - we send out the boomerang and expect the refrigerator to come to us on the return route. Remember only one thought can be sent out at a time and the negative one will cancel out the positive one. We cannot lie to God and we cannot lie to our subconscious mind, which is our great powerhouse. We can however work on our ability to believe in our power when coupled with God/Universe/Spirit/Creative Energy. And we can own our feelings. But one of the most powerful, and easiest things we can do is also free!! We can use our imagination.
That being said, as Gayle had done countless times, imagine yourself and how you will feel in the future with your goal being successfully met. Relish it in great detail using all your senses until you truly do feel it. This is especially powerful when it is done just before falling asleep at night and upon awakening, as well when you pray and or meditate. When you are doing a mundane task like dishes, or riding an exercise bike is an opportune time also.
Now for an update about Gayle. I think one of the things that may have had her stuck by the way was her being a little too willing to allow her own self-esteem to take such a hit so that she put up with too much for too long with Carl. God never wants us to dishonor our own being. Respecting herself (in thought/feeling and actions - aka vibration) first and foremost may have been her missing piece in the formula.
In a recent e mail she shared with me that indeed a miracle appears to be taking place. Carl has told her how much he values her and how lucky he is to have her! Romance is once again blooming for them. She is understandably cautious but feels much more positive about their future. She will fill me in on the rest of the details when we meet. I can hardly wait.
In the meantime I replied in my e mail : EXPECT A MIRACLE!
Until next time, envision your success and use that untapped power of your imagination to make your dreams come true.
Blessings and love to you and those you love~
Dr. DyAnn
Monday, December 27, 2010
A Holiday Story
This is a holiday story - a true story. And like all true life stories it has both its high points and low points. As you read it I am confident that it will speak to you with whatever messages you are meant to hear.
I first met "Brandon" and his dad "Tim" when Brandon was in big time trouble in college for failing grades and drug use. Tim, a highly successful businessman, was mad as hell and worried sick about him. More than anything he wanted his son to be happy in life and he knew that Brandon was going about it all wrong. In our individual sessions it almost hurt my own heart as I listened to this father who had such obvious love for his son. And I knew that Brandon was not liking dad's tough love approach so things were pretty rough for a while.
Even though it did not seem like it in the midst of the counseling process, I always knew that Brandon would "get it" some day. He had the deep sensitivity of an old soul but he was living the life of a wounded young man who never got beyond some childhood issues including the ugly divorce his parents went thru and his mother's continued bitterness.
We made our way thru the counseling process and Brandon was successfully launched on his life path. I continued to counsel Tim at various junctures in his personal life as time passed but had not heard from him in several years.
Just before Thanksgiving I was delighted to get an e mail from Brandon. Until I read it, that is. His father, who always took excellent care of himself had literally dropped dead at age 59.
Brandon was heart broken. You see, over the years he and his dad had built a wonderful father~son relationship. They enjoyed football games and other "guy stuff" including Tim advising Brandon about finding the right special someone to share his life with. Now in what seemed like a bad dream it was all gone.
There is never, ever a time that is "better" than others to lose someone that you love deeply; but losing someone special during the holidays is especially harsh (whether they die or any other level of loss of a relationship). Memories that would normally be gladly embraced feel empty and haunting. The joy of others becomes an irritation and Christmas, rather than something to be celebrated is something you just want to be over with.
To make matters even worse for Brandon, his family did not draw closer together following Tim's death. He had made the effort of a Thanksgiving get together as some sort of healing family event but was met with tremendous negativity.
When it came to making Christmas plans he shared with me some of the e-mails that were exchanged between his siblings as well as his mother. As a therapist I could see that they were the misplaced feelings of unresolved layers of grief, pain, poor communication and all that would no longer be. But to the eyes and heart of Brandon they were blaming, dismissive, nasty and and among some members just plain hateful! "Happy blanking holidays" as he said. His family had never been close but now he had this additional loss.
It was now a pivotal time in Brandon's healing process. And this is what makes this a special story. Remember that I said I always knew that somehow Brandon would "get it" some day? He sent an e mail to me today and in the subject line it says "I made it"; that is in reference to the celebration of Christmas.
He did join his family for a few hours but he also "visited his dad" at the cemetery. He shared with me that they had a talk. Brandon came to realize that all his dad wanted was for him to be happy. He shares with me in his e mail:
"My happiness is totally dependent on what is inside of me, not what anyone else says and does.... I feel free and happier than I have ever been. Somehow throughout my life I have always received just the right guidance at the right time from that god/goddess in the sky and I know that will continue to be true.... My goal is to be the best person I can possibly be and I really embrace that idea."
I know that Tim is very proud of him.
Blessings and love to you during this holiday season. May your heart open to receive what ever it is that you need. Like Brandon you never know when there is a miracle right around the corner, just waiting for you.
Until next time~
Dr. DyAnn
I first met "Brandon" and his dad "Tim" when Brandon was in big time trouble in college for failing grades and drug use. Tim, a highly successful businessman, was mad as hell and worried sick about him. More than anything he wanted his son to be happy in life and he knew that Brandon was going about it all wrong. In our individual sessions it almost hurt my own heart as I listened to this father who had such obvious love for his son. And I knew that Brandon was not liking dad's tough love approach so things were pretty rough for a while.
Even though it did not seem like it in the midst of the counseling process, I always knew that Brandon would "get it" some day. He had the deep sensitivity of an old soul but he was living the life of a wounded young man who never got beyond some childhood issues including the ugly divorce his parents went thru and his mother's continued bitterness.
We made our way thru the counseling process and Brandon was successfully launched on his life path. I continued to counsel Tim at various junctures in his personal life as time passed but had not heard from him in several years.
Just before Thanksgiving I was delighted to get an e mail from Brandon. Until I read it, that is. His father, who always took excellent care of himself had literally dropped dead at age 59.
Brandon was heart broken. You see, over the years he and his dad had built a wonderful father~son relationship. They enjoyed football games and other "guy stuff" including Tim advising Brandon about finding the right special someone to share his life with. Now in what seemed like a bad dream it was all gone.
There is never, ever a time that is "better" than others to lose someone that you love deeply; but losing someone special during the holidays is especially harsh (whether they die or any other level of loss of a relationship). Memories that would normally be gladly embraced feel empty and haunting. The joy of others becomes an irritation and Christmas, rather than something to be celebrated is something you just want to be over with.
To make matters even worse for Brandon, his family did not draw closer together following Tim's death. He had made the effort of a Thanksgiving get together as some sort of healing family event but was met with tremendous negativity.
When it came to making Christmas plans he shared with me some of the e-mails that were exchanged between his siblings as well as his mother. As a therapist I could see that they were the misplaced feelings of unresolved layers of grief, pain, poor communication and all that would no longer be. But to the eyes and heart of Brandon they were blaming, dismissive, nasty and and among some members just plain hateful! "Happy blanking holidays" as he said. His family had never been close but now he had this additional loss.
It was now a pivotal time in Brandon's healing process. And this is what makes this a special story. Remember that I said I always knew that somehow Brandon would "get it" some day? He sent an e mail to me today and in the subject line it says "I made it"; that is in reference to the celebration of Christmas.
He did join his family for a few hours but he also "visited his dad" at the cemetery. He shared with me that they had a talk. Brandon came to realize that all his dad wanted was for him to be happy. He shares with me in his e mail:
"My happiness is totally dependent on what is inside of me, not what anyone else says and does.... I feel free and happier than I have ever been. Somehow throughout my life I have always received just the right guidance at the right time from that god/goddess in the sky and I know that will continue to be true.... My goal is to be the best person I can possibly be and I really embrace that idea."
I know that Tim is very proud of him.
Blessings and love to you during this holiday season. May your heart open to receive what ever it is that you need. Like Brandon you never know when there is a miracle right around the corner, just waiting for you.
Until next time~
Dr. DyAnn
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